Cotton on Trial

It was a small tent where he found himself a few minutes later. Thankfully, they'd given him a blanket. He rolled himself up in it and tried to sleep. He tried to remind himself that things were never as bad in the morning as they were at night, but even so, he was dreading the morning and what it would bring.

But he was proud of his Maggie, and proud that she'd chosen to still be his Maggie. He just hoped she would think it worth everything.

(OOC - Bed's calling me too, very loudly. I'll see all of you guys tomorrow.)

Maggie thought that she might as well go to the 60th, though it would be strange without Cotton. It had been strange after James had died, when she felt so very alone. She still at times felt like a guest, and now she was a guest without a host. But everyone had been kind to her then, and they would be sympathetic tonight. Cotton was well liked. And he wasn't dead - he wouldn't be dying in the morning. He would be back beside her soon. It wasn't the same as when Jem had died. She had to keep reminding herself of that.

She looked up at Williams walking beside her. "Will you stay with me a little while?"

Williams thought over what she had said. "No, I don't think so," he said bluntly. "You'll be better off with the 60th, and what would they say if I stayed among them? They don't know me, not even as Cotton's friend. And you don't know me either, if it comes to that. What will he think, when the stories get back, about you spending the night before he was flogged, with me? It wouldn't look right, no matter how proper it is."

He thought about being flogged and added: "And I've got to be back. There's a corporal there who might need me on duty tonight. It isn't all lounging about fires talking about girls. You'll be all right with Cotton's mates, Maggie. You don't need me as well."

By now they had arrived at the 60th camping ground and he clasped her shoulder quickly and turned and walked back through the 62nd towards the Young Inniskillings.

Maggie stared after him a few moments feeling stunned and ashamed, but there was Molly Macgregor pressing a cup of tea into her hand and leading her to where they had brought her baggage.

Observing the sad spectacle before him he had to turn away. A poor lass worried about her man who was Cotton, by the looks of it, so crushed with the pain and fear for his being. It was as if torn out from one of those books that high class ladies loved to read. Romance novels which too often prooved to be untrue. But not here. The lass cared, and he did not need an expert to confirm that she loved her dearest, and he, worried for her even when it was he who would be hurt. This wasn't just a military drill where none did more but march with their eyes straight ahead and their emotions left somewhere back in Lisbon.

It was human nature. It made them all more than just soldiers, pawns to be moved across the board, numbers that were doomed to die. A story of care, of love and of heart had left the Hussar dazed , lost in thought. Though it hurt them both now, it was sure to bring them together, closer in the very end. It was somewhat ironic how things went. From the most horrible an ordeal the most beautiful thing could be made. It was, he mused, very much like a clam, who's beautiful pearls were created from its suffering and pain.

A stab of his own had reminded him that this was albeit still a camp, and they were all soldiers, and that he, should he decide to seek out an officer ought best do it then, or go and sit bloody down! And either way, most have departed by now, and Cotton was taken away, miss Maggie with another lady.

He couldn't sleep, much as he needed to. His mind was too full of thinking about the morning. He was dreading it, which was only to be expected. One part of him wanted to get it done as soon as possible, while another part wanted the night never to end and morning never to arrive.

He clung to the fact that Vickery still believed in him, and that Maggie didn't want to find someone else. Two people at least still believed in him, and that meant something to him. Though how he could ever show what it meant, to either of them, he had no idea.

And again his mind circled back to tomorrow morning. He found the thought both fascinating and dreadful, and just wanted to be able to pull a curtain over his thoughts and shut them out of his waking mind, even for a few short minutes.

"Gabe... are you awake?"

He turned towards the voice.

"Maggie? Maggie, is that you, lass?"

She ducked quickly into the tent. "There y'are, Gabe! Are you all right?"

"Better for seein' you, girl." He sat up, wrapping the blanket around his shoulders. "But I can't sleep for dreadin' it, lass. I never thought I'd be flogged, never." He reached out a hand, searching for hers in the darkness. "I... I'm a-feared of it, lass. That I'll disgrace meself, you, the Captain, even the Company."

She pressed his hand reassuringly and sat next to him. "How can you disgrace yourself? No, they're disgraced, the ones that are sending you... and everyone will know it. But here, I've brought something for you. I'd better hurry before they catch me - here in your private tent! Why don't I get a private tent?" And he could hear her smiling in the dark.

Perhaps this second day.. or part of it atleast, was not again the best time to appear before the other officers, for it was late and had been so due to the length and lateness of the trial. He wondered into returning back to his present station where he could rest. He could not spot the man with whom he needed to talk, and the officer of the rifles was already informed. So part of his duty was completed, and perhaps another would be the other day? Still feeling out of place amongst the men, he had felt useless when barely on foot.

He turned slow, and began to walk, a limp more evident and less pleasing. By all means, he's really gone to waste his time. (if this is true) for he has not even gone to see a doctor's opinion to his injury. Another thing in need of remedying, but with all minds set on the flogging tomorrow, perhaps a thing of the future, solely.

"You'm a comfort to me, Maggie, my own girl." He slipped an arm around her shoulders. "I know you'll look after me after... after it's all done."

"Of course. Of course I will, Gabe," she said tenderly, pausing in the middle of what seemed like a rush. "But listen now, I have to hurry so let me give you this." She had to shift his arm so she could reach up to the back of her neck.

He felt her shift a little and reach behind her. "You all right there, lass?" he asked, unable to see what she was doing.

She laughed. "Will be in a second... there." She found his hand and placed something small and metal in it, still warm. "There, you take that. That's my locket. Oh, I should have brought a light to show it to you but I didn't think of it! But on the back there's an M, that's for Margaret, and there's an E for Evans - that's my mother, and that's me too. My father gave it to my mother when-- oh, and inside there's a lock of her hair, but I put mine in there too for you. Hers is lighter than mine. Now you take it, and you keep it, all right? You keep it safe. And then I'll be with you, there," she said, emphasizing the last word by pressing his hand closed over the little pendant and its chain. She was speaking in such a hurry, anxious not to get caught by the guards, but also with such gravity as if her instructions were vitally important. "Will you?"

He was touched. "Aye. I will, lass. I promise. An' I will give you something to wear one day, too." He paused for a moment. He couldn't let his next words get mixed up in what he'd just said. "I love you, Maggie. My woman, sweeting."

Maggie was silent for a moment, too startled to say anything. "Gabe..." she murmured in a confused and surprised voice - but she was still holding his hand.

"I love you, Maggie Evans," Cotton said, determined to make her know it. "But, like I promised, I won't make you do anythin' you don't want. I just.. wanted you to know."

She exhaled heavily. She had been holding her breath for a moment without realizing it. She was silent again, and then she finally replied as if answering a simple question. "Of course I... Of course I love you. Of course I do. I do. Love you. Gabe." And she realized that she felt quite calm.

It was a little strange to say that, and to hear it, for the first time, but it was quite true. Cotton knew it was. It was nice sitting here like this, just sharing each other's company, but he knew that it wouldn't last forever. And there was still tomorrow morning to go...

"Maggie.. if you... if you need to watch, tomorrow, it's all right," he said, hesitantly. He wanted to spare her that, but somehow he knew that it might be worse for her if she felt she had to stay away because of what he wanted.

"Are you sure?" She wanted to be there. She was afraid. She had lost Jem, and she hadn't been there when he died on the battlefield. It had tormented her, broken her heart that he had died without her there, without hearing her voice, and that she hadn't had a chance to say goodbye or even see him one last time. That wasn't going to happen tomorrow - Cotton wasn't going to die. She knew that. But she was afraid. And although she had only just realized a few moments earlier that she loved him, it was firmly established in her mind that she did not want to lose him.

"Yes, I'm sure, lass." He had made up his mind, and decided that if she really needed to see it, he was not going to stop her.

"I... It'll look bad, lass, they allus do. If... if you have a friend, someone you can trust to look after you, tell them, ask them to stand with you. I want to know you'll be all right, y'see, and I won't be able to look after like I want."

She nodded, but of course he couldn't see that. "I'll be all right. I think Sarah Palmer will go with me if I ask her." Go with me if I ask her - sounds like a country dance.

"It'll be all right, Gabe. This time tomorrow, it'll be all over and finished, and - and you'll probably be asleep," she added with a light laugh. Then she gasped. "Oh Gabe! I've been here so long! I'd better go. Annie will be so worried."

"Annie.. Maggie, would you tell Annie from me to think afore she says summat? And you take care, lass, do."

He felt much better now that she had come to see him, and managed to chase his fears away, at least a little. "Aye, but this time tomorrow might be a while coming," he said. He realised he was still holding her gift in his hand.

"Afore you go, would you help me put this on?" he asked, holding his hand out to her so she would know what he meant.